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30-Dec-2014 01:12

I packed two of everything: juice boxes, cracker bags, and organic fruit gummies. Gabe reminded me of Jack when he was 3 or 4 — skinny and tiny with long blond hair and always carrying something. We entered the building, and the kids dashed toward a cow statue dressed in baseball memorabilia. They were engaged but never married, and he wouldn’t stand for visitation, so he’d sought joint custody. ” He had moved out of the house he and his ex shared and rented a place of his own blocks away in order to be close to Gabe and make the co-parenting situation more fluid and natural for his child.Tall Eric arrived at the baseball museum in a newsboy hat, shorts, a T-shirt, and a braided hemp bracelet (so not Mr. It all seemed so foreign to me — not only was my ex not involved in our lives, there were four states between us.Minutes later, Jack came speeding into me, declaring that he was “dying of thirst.” I unzipped his snack tote and handed him a juice box. I didn’t expect the situation with Tall Eric to be any different — and it wasn’t.He took one giant gulp, handed the pouch back to me, and said, “Gotta go, Mom! A few days later, I dropped him an e-mail; we made a plan to meet, but I had to bow out when my babysitter canceled on me. My son, Jack, 6, was playing with his 4-year-old, Gabe. He was cute, laid-back, and about 10 years older than me. But then Tall Eric gave me his card and asked me to be in touch. You rely on costly babysitters because there’s no father to step in every other weekend.Tall Eric and another guy were occupying the nearest bench, so I rested my arms on the fence, watching the kids. Meeting new people can seem impossible and exhausting.I wouldn’t feel guilty about having a sleepover at a boyfriend’s house because Jack would be on his father’s time and that distinction would make me feel better about going out.We decided to try for drinks instead; Jack got sick. After a failed eight-month relationship, part of me didn’t have it in me to start again. Suit had liked his life the way it was: powerful career, nice meals, expensive wine, late snuggly Sunday mornings — all while my son was safe at his grandparents’ house. to Jack jumping on my bed and waffle picnics on the carpet. I dig relationships (and their attendant perks), but I have no problem being a single mom.

I didn’t tell them Jack’s dad left when I was 11 weeks pregnant. “I’m a single parent, too.” Over the next hour, I tied Jack’s shoelaces, dished out handfuls of rainbow Goldfish crackers, and talked to Tall Eric about single parenthood and his work as a filmmaker and mine as a writer.Then we scheduled a lunch date for a time when our kids were in school, but a freelance gig came up, and I had to take it.As Eric spoke, I began imagining what my life would be like if Jack’s dad were a part of his life — and mine.I would have weekends off to go running, to sleep in — and to go on a kid-free date.That doesn’t mean I don’t yearn for connection, though — which is why I texted Tall Eric one Saturday morning to hang out with us. It soon became clear that the boys were more interested in playing hide-and-seek than in taking in baseball history, so we headed to the park where we’d all met.

I didn’t tell them Jack’s dad left when I was 11 weeks pregnant. “I’m a single parent, too.” Over the next hour, I tied Jack’s shoelaces, dished out handfuls of rainbow Goldfish crackers, and talked to Tall Eric about single parenthood and his work as a filmmaker and mine as a writer.

Then we scheduled a lunch date for a time when our kids were in school, but a freelance gig came up, and I had to take it.

As Eric spoke, I began imagining what my life would be like if Jack’s dad were a part of his life — and mine.

I would have weekends off to go running, to sleep in — and to go on a kid-free date.

That doesn’t mean I don’t yearn for connection, though — which is why I texted Tall Eric one Saturday morning to hang out with us. It soon became clear that the boys were more interested in playing hide-and-seek than in taking in baseball history, so we headed to the park where we’d all met.

Finally, a date worked out — because our kids were worked in. While the kids played, Tall Eric told me about his son’s mother.